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When considering what qualities make a strong leader, people often think of things like problem solving skills, intelligence, or creativity. However, emotional intelligence (or EI) can be the difference between a mediocre leader and an outstanding one. While EI comes more easily to some individuals than others, it is absolutely a skill that can be learned and honed1

Introduction and EI Coaching Information

This coaching program focuses on helping employees or managers develop emotional intelligence skills, identify and regulate emotions, de-escalate conflict, build trust, and improve collaboration. For managers and leadership, the coaching is expanded to cover the benefits of EI for leaders, (such as expanding influence, building trust, motivating and inspiring employees), strategies to effectively manage diverse teams, and ensure that employees feel understood and supported. Diversity Builder’s coaches will walk the manager or employee through an assessment of your strengths and weaknesses and arm the trainee with concrete strategies to improve your emotional intelligence, helping to bring their career to the next level.

Diversity Builder offers single sessions or multiple sessions, both of which will be customized based on the client’s needs and interests. After completing the training, clients will receive a detailed training report with documentation and the employee’s action plan.


[1] 5 Components of Emotional Intelligence You Need to Become a More Effective Leader
https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2017/02/why-you-need-emotional-intelligence/


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What is Emotional Intelligence?

John D. Mayer and Peter Salovey coined this term and define emotional intelligence as “the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one’s thinking and actions.”2
There are internal and external components to emotional intelligence. We need to be aware of our own emotions, have the ability to manage them, and understand the emotions of others in order to become adept at EI. More specifically, self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management are the four pillars of emotional intelligence.3

Self-awareness, or having a realistic view of our own abilities and our impact on others, is foundational to the rest of emotional intelligence. Few of us have a realistic or complete view of our own abilities, but this course will provide a thorough assessment to provide the foundation for the rest of our EI coaching program.

The next step in cultivating emotional intelligence is self-management. Self-management simply means being able to control our emotions and our responses, especially in stressful or high-stakes situations.4 While this can be challenging, we will provide clients with specific, actionable tools for managing emotions and responding in a professional way.

Once we are in tune with our own emotions and capable of managing our responses, social awareness comes into play. If someone is socially aware, they recognize the emotions of others and demonstrate empathy for them. As psychologist Cary Cherniss wrote, “Emotional intelligence has as much to do with knowing when and how to express emotion as it does with controlling it.”5 In other words, an emotionally intelligent leader will be able to read a room and gauge whether their message or approach should be modified to match the social dynamics and environment.

Finally, relationship management is the last major component of EI. Being aware of others’ emotions, we can leverage that awareness to make tangible changes in our teams and organizations, including improving relationships with our employees and coworkers. While it might be the most difficult skill of the four, relationship management is the crowning achievement of EI as well as a pivotal skill for all leaders.


[2] Salovey and Mayer, Emotional Intelligence, p. 189
[3] Why Emotional Intelligence is Important in Leadership https://online.hbs.edu/blog/post/emotional-intelligence-in-leadership
[4] Why Emotional Intelligence is Important in Leadership https://online.hbs.edu/blog/post/emotional-intelligence-in-leadership
[5] Emotional Intelligence: What it is and Why it Matters https://www.eiconsortium.org/reports/what_is_emotional_intelligence.html


Why Does Emotional Intelligence Matter for Leaders?

Now that we’ve described EI, we’ll discuss how it makes leaders and organizations exponentially more effective. As we discuss below, emotional intelligence is a crucial component for both organizational success as well as the performance and satisfaction of individual leaders and employees.

Advantages of Developing Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace
There are numerous clear advantages to developing EI in all employees, especially leaders and managers. Research demonstrates that staff in empathetic workplaces tend to perform better.6 People who are free to take calculated risks, and those who feel supported in their professional and personal lives, will most likely be less stressed and more capable of doing challenging work at a high level. Moreover, managers with a high degree of emotional intelligence are more likely to retain their employees.7 An emotionally intelligent leader who encourages open communication and welcomes questions and suggestions will quickly gain the loyalty of their direct reports. EI can even change negative social dynamics by emphasizing the social nature of a positive work environment. In opening conversations by checking in with team members and demonstrating interest in them as people (instead of jumping directly to business), leaders can spark dialogue and collaboration with employees.8

While encouraging EI in leadership is important on an interpersonal level, it also has an effect on organizational efficiency. Leaders who can’t communicate empathetically won’t be able to address conflict or problem-solve effectively, which can spill over into the wider business. According to Joseph Grenny, author of Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High:

We found that employees waste an average of $1,500 and an 8-hour workday for every crucial confrontation they avoid. In extreme cases of avoidance, an organization’s bottom line can be hit especially hard. In addition, a shocking 8 percent of employees estimate their inability to deal with conflict costs their organization more than $10,000. And one in 20 estimates that over the course of a drawn-out silent conflict, they waste time ruminating about the problem for more than 6 months.9

Developing EI skills avoids delays and waste, empowering leaders to directly address issues and successfully tackle projects while maintaining excellent relationships with employees.


[6] The Importance of Empathy in the Workplace https://www.ccl.org/articles/leading-effectively-articles/empathy-in-the-workplace-a-tool-for-effective-leadership/
[7] Emotionally Intelligent Leadership and Employee Retention https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbeshumanresourcescouncil/2023/07/11/emotionally-intelligent-leadership-and-employee-retention/?sh=616f56ed40f2
[8] Avoiding Conflict is Killing Your Bottom Line, https://cruciallearning.com/blog/avoiding-conflict-is-killing-your-bottom-line/
[9] Avoiding Conflict is Killing Your Bottom Line, https://cruciallearning.com/blog/avoiding-conflict-is-killing-your-bottom-line/


Lastly, EI has a direct impact on how one’s performance is perceived by others. For example, employees who treat their reports with empathy are seen as better performers by their own supervisors.10 So in addition to improving your team’s output, it will also reflect well on you as an effective employee and manager.

What Steps Can I Take to Develop My Emotional Intelligence?

Working through the four components described above are key to increasing your emotional intelligence. For self-awareness, it can be difficult to appraise your own strengths and weaknesses, so consider an employee review process like 360-degree feedback instead. This involves collecting feedback from a variety of people in your organization – for example, peers, direct reports, and supervisors – to gain a realistic and detailed perspective on your own performance. Ideally this feedback would take the form of anonymous reports to ensure that people are being candid.

Once you’ve received reports or other types of feedback, reflect on the information and think about how to implement it in your work life for the self-management step. For example, if you were told that you tend to be reactive and impulsive, practice taking a moment to breathe and reflect before responding in stressful scenarios. Being a responsive leader, instead of a reactive one, will be invaluable to this process.

Social awareness is the next step to consider. In addition to working on your own habits and reactions, you should consider how things might look or feel to others in your organization. Noting the mood in the room and anticipating how organizational changes might affect employees will help in connecting with your subordinates and in delivering information in an effective and empathetic way.

Finally, relationship management brings all of these skills together to make the most of EI. Remember, relationship management comprises your skill to “influence, coach, and mentor others, and resolve conflict effectively.”11 In practice, this could look like building camaraderie with other teams and leaders in order to identify shared goals and complete projects utilizing everyone’s unique strengths.


[10] The Importance of Empathy in the Workplace https://www.ccl.org/articles/leading-effectively-articles/empathy-in-the-workplace-a-tool-for-effective-leadership/
[11] Why Emotional Intelligence is Important in Leadership https://online.hbs.edu/blog/post/emotional-intelligence-in-leadership


In addition to the four components of emotional intelligence, there are specific steps that leaders can take to ensure that they are promoting a supportive atmosphere. The Center for Creative Leadership, which specializes in professional development and assessment for leaders, suggests ensuring that employees have sustainable workloads, demonstrating an interest in one’s employees, and supporting them through personal difficulties.12 These measures will make team members feel valued and position them to do their best possible work. Other sources suggest that clear communication and cultivating a positive workplace in which emotional intelligence and psychological safety are valued are also important.13 When people know what to expect and feel free to ask questions and make mistakes, they will operate from a place of confidence and security instead of fear.

Since it is impossible to lead empathetically without understanding the needs and mindsets of others, these steps rely on conversations that allow leaders and employees to talk honestly and to get to know one another better. Using these techniques demonstrates that a leader respects their staff as people deserving of respect, not resources to be used to meet goals. Implementing these strategies will not only set the stage for a high-performing and loyal workforce, it will also elevate your own careers as a successful manager.

EI Reference Material and Further Reading

Interested in learning more? The following pieces were cited in this article and provide in-depth information on the importance of emotional intelligence in leadership and the workplace.

Avoiding Conflict is Killing Your Bottom Line, Crucial Skills Blog

Emotional Intelligence, Imagination, Cognition and Personality Journal

Emotionally Intelligent Leadership and Employee Retention, Forbes

Emotional Intelligence: What it is and Why it Matters, Consortium for Research on Emotional Intelligence in Organizations

Emotional Intelligence: What it is and Why You Need it, World Economic Forum

Five Components of Emotional Intelligence You Need to Become a More Effective Leader, World Economic Forum

How to Resolve Workplace Conflicts, HR Magazine

The Importance of Empathy in the Workplace, Center for Creative Leadership

Why Emotional Intelligence is Important in Leadership, Harvard Business School Online’s Business Insights Blog


[12] The Importance of Empathy in the Workplace https://www.ccl.org/articles/leading-effectively-articles/empathy-in-the-workplace-a-tool-for-effective-leadership/
[13] Emotionally Intelligent Leadership and Employee Retention https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbeshumanresourcescouncil/2023/07/11/emotionally-intelligent-leadership-and-employee-retention/?sh=616f56ed40f2